The impending doom of adulthood

I am 36 years old. This is the oldest I have ever been, my PR. Everyday I wake up to a new PR, and it should feel like an achievement but it does not. I want my life to have some purpose, but let's be completely realistic here (completely), life will have the purpose you give to it. And if you don't find the time and don't make the effort to find your purpose, life will pass you by. You'll live through the motions, you will do whatever you have been raised to suppose you should be doing, and you will die. Family and friends will mourn you, then they'll just remember you, and finally you will be forgotten forever when they themselves die. It sound harsh, but let's not be too emotional about this: it is nature.

Till very recently my life purpose has been dictated by my career pathway: I have lived where I had to live to get a job, I have left when I did not have a job anymore, and I have left people behind. It feels very normal to do so when you are young and you have been told that your career will be defining the rest of your life. However, it sounds funny when you put it into words, right? Life = work. This equation is oversimplified, of course. Your life is obviously spiced up by personal development, which includes everything that makes you "happy" and that it does "not feel like work". Such us family, friends, gym, movie marathons... I've decided not to live by that equation anymore.

I'm a scientist. That's my person simplified to just a 3-word sentence. Let's wide it up. I'm a woman and a scientist. It gets interesting. As a scientist I can look at the world from a very scientific perspective (duh), and as a woman I am supposed to look at the world from a very different point of view. I am supposed to be a mother, I am supposed to be a caregiver, I am supposed to be emotional. However, I am supposed to be emotional in a particular way, I should look for affection and be compassionate. There is a conflict inside of me, but this conflict is not real. It has been sociologically inherited from past generations but it is not enforced anymore. And if it is, it is to no real consequence in my environment. I will be punished for stepping out of the line, but it won't be so bad. So my scientific minds tells me I can do whatever I want to change my life and find my purpose. And my woman mind tells me that being a scientist should not be the only thing that defines me.

So I am in a journey of self discovery. Using the scientific method I will determine what I want to be. My new 3-word sentence. It is going to be awesomeballz.

Elvira

I am back!

Hello myself again!

I have decided to give to this blogging thing another try :).
I am not sure yet what I will blog about, so I will be trying different things to see what suits me better, yay!

E.

Sample day in the veganized 4HB diet

Even though I will be changing my diet pretty soon to include some fruit and increase variety, this is a sample of what I've been eating in the veganized 4HB for the past 2.5 months. I haven't lost weight, but I have definitely increased muscular mass.

Breakfast: brown rice protein shake in unsweetened almond milk, 1 cup lentil scramble

Lunch: Lentil soup with kale and 2 veggie links; or vegan chili with meat-less ground meat

Mid-afternoon snack: 15 cashews; or a bunch of kale chips

Dinner: Baby spinach salad with nooch, 2 veggie burgers; or baby spinach with guacamame; 1 glass of red wine

Dessert: 2 tsp almond butter, or chia seed chocolate pudding

Soon I will be posting my training schedule. I am playing around with it, and starting HIIT to see if I can loose those 10 pounds :)

See ya!

Elvira.

Yogi Tea Wisdom

Live by intuition and consciousness.

Veganized 4HB breakfast (attempt #2)

Hi everybody!

So I have decided to optimize my "veganized 4HB" diet, basically by removing tofu from it: seems like it was not allowed, at least in the quantities I have been having it :D. I think my body reacts to it too, probably some mild allergy?

So my principal concern was breakfast. I used to have one protein shake (almond milk + 2 scoops rice protein) and 1 serving of tofu scramble to meet the protein requirements for breakfast. Now, I am having my protein shake plus... wait for it... LENTIL SCRAMBLE! Well, it is not technically "scramble", but...

Here it goes the recipe:

- 3 cans of cooked organic lentils, drained and rinsed (it is better if you cook your own lentils, as canned beans have higher GI, but I was in a rush ;))

- 4 garlic cloves, minced

- 13 oz crushed tomatoes (half a big can)

- some mushrooms (I use a packet of trader's joe fresh sliced mushrooms)

- thyme to taste

- salt to taste

- 2 Tablespoons olive or macadamia oil.

This is SUPER EASY. Just fry the garlic in oil till golden, then add mushrooms and tomato, and let it cook till the tomato thickens. At this point I add salt and thyme, or any other spice you want to use. When the sauce is thick enough, I turn off the heat and add the lentils, mix all, and ready to go!

This amount of lentils lasts for 6 days aprox., it all depends on how hungry you are in the mornings :)

Enjoy!

E.

PD, It is amazing, I don't get gassy when I eat lentils, so I can abuse as much as I want :)

My problems on the veganized 4HB diet

Well well well, I have been on this diet for almost 3 months now, with little success. Not because the diet doesn't work (I guess it does), but most likely because I didn't manage to adjust it to my vegan lifestyle.
I don't consider I have wasted my time, but there are some things that necessarily need to be fixed.

1. I don't get enough protein if I don't add excessive amounts of tofu. I like tofu, but I think my body doesn't like it as much as I do. Also I think it's a food that in this diet is kind of "forbidden", so then I am cheating every day big time :(
2. An alternative is eating huge amounts of beans, and definitely that it's not good for me either. Let's put it simple: I have so much gas that I could fly ;)
3. I have managed to find comfort food, and I abuse of it. I prepare a chocolate tofu pudding I took from the vegetarian south beach diet, and I just cannot stop till I finish the whole thing!
4. I snack a lot, and specially nuts. I'm going nuts for nuts! Now I try to eat only 15 cashews, but I swear I could eat the whole bag. Or devour the whole PB jar.
   
5. I don't have enough energy in the gym from day 1. Definitely that is really bugging me. Now I cannot even run for 5 min without panting. I don't like the idea that I am probably loosing shape on this diet. I used to go 5 times a week and now I go only 3, and hardly.
   

So I am trying to get back on track, but it's not going to be easy. I have acquired some bad habits that it would be difficult to get rid of. I'm thinking about doing 2 more weeks (that would be 12 weeks total), and then go to South Beach diet phase 2 but keeping breakfast of 4HB (rice protein shake on almond milk plus tofu scramble). Then I can start planning on starting over on 4HB later on.
What do you think?

E.

The Wrestler (2008)

How I ended up watching this movie: I received the DVD as a secret Santa gift last year.

IMDb: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1125849/

My rating: didn't like it (sorry!)

This movie is about a professional wrestler (Mickey Rourke, what's wrong with his face?!?) and how his live gets completely affected after suffering a heart attack. What should he do? Follow the doctors' advice and stop wrestling? or just continue with his passion and die with the boots on? The idea for the movie is so-so. It didn't get to me, at least. We are witnesses of how this guy realizes that the only thing in his life worth to live for is his job. Well, that can happen to many people. I didn't like the wrestling part though, I know Mickey has been a professional boxer and fits for the role, buuuuuut... I ended up just waiting for the movie to end.
Let's see if Darren Aronofsky can hook me up with his new movie, The Black Swan (I really hope he does)

E.